There is nothing I hate more than change. I hate the way the leaves change color and fall off the trees. I hate when you wake up one morning and realize you need a second blanket on the bed. I whole heartedly dislike when I discover one of the girls has outgrown their clothes and I need to get something larger. I especially dislike when it happens to me. And I really get irritated when something in the refrigerator has gone past its due date and I realize it has spoiled without my knowing it and now I have to throw away the one I bought and buy another one. (I guess that one just means I'm cheap).
We've had some changes lately. The first is that my husband has been traveling a little bit and that has left me in charge. I hate when he is gone. I don't sleep well. The girls don't sleep well. The animals don't sleep well. We try to put on a brave face but it fails miserably. I get tired, irritated, grumpy, strung out and snappy and it is all I can do to keep things on track.
I have anxiety issues. That means when there is a lot of change I have an increase in my anxiety levels and I sometimes will have to use my superpowers to override a panic attack here or there. I only recently discovered that I had anxiety issues - within the last 4 years - so this is a fairly new thing. Since I'm in charge of 2 kids and 2 pets and 1 husband and not allowed to get stoned all day to mellow out, I have had to learn how to handle these attacks through the following:
1) breathing
2) mantras
3) meditation
4) yoga
5) exercise
6) therapy
7) time out
Another thing that is happening right now is that we are talking about a move. A big one. That is all I'm gonna say right now but it will involve a lot of changes, big changes. I'm sort of freaking out - inside and not outside - at least not yet. I'm saving the real freak outs for later.
So far I'm doing pretty good. I am pretty darn close to a super hero as far as I'm concerned. But I do have to have things well organized and consistent and planned out and that doesn't always work with kids and life and pets and husband. So I do have to dig deep once in awhile and get creative. Life doesn't stop for me to get used to changes just like I don't stop and lay down and play dead so bring it! Sometimes even I like to see what I'm made of.
1 comment:
Oh Joy, hang in there and I will buy you a beer at Christmastime. Don't move before then!
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